January 15, 2011


Another terrible storyboard, this time, the protagonist does nothing but want!

Bear looking through bars

Cuts to him looking through bars

OTS with a tree silhouette in distance

Cuts close, it's a beehive

Cuts back, bear wants

Looks back (hears something)

Cuts out, shadow approaching

Zooms out, it's the guard (cheap prop: it's christmas)

Camera drops following cop to meet bear looking at keys

Cuts OTS, guard opening

Guard opening, has pancakes

Cuts to bear, guard in the distance

Cuts to his pancakes on hand

CU to bear

Top down, guard throws pancake platter

Camera drops to bear with pancakes in hand

Camera tilts up

Tilts up

Bear head tilts up

Expression change on CU

Cuts POV of pancakes

Bear wants

Cuts out to bear looking with bars

CU bear for expression change

Cuts to early shot with tree in silhouette


Zooms in with honey dripping

MCU to bear with pancakes

OTS, guard approach (note cheap santa prop)

Hands extends with something

Bear snout FG, guard hands him present (honey)

Guard squeezes out honey

Bear eats pancake

Everything went better than expected

So, why is this bad? Hm...it was supposed to be centered around a christmas present, the only indication was that cheap santa hat. Maybe some snow outside may have helped, maybe a reef or two? Biggest problem, the bear does nothing to get the honey, it's literally handed to him. There wasn't really even a climax?  Thinking about it, the story goes from the first act, skips everything between, and just goes to resolution; the button

Story is hard.

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